Essa Alroc
I am a former cubicle worker who wrote my way out of the little blue box and into a relatively successful freelancing career. By relatively successful, I mean I’m not using the internet access at the public library yet.
I’ve finished three novels to date and will continue writing more, no matter how much hate mail I get. Suck it haters. My first series is about a delusional sociopath who takes advice from a Gary Busey hallucination. It is biographical.
I originally started my blog to shamelessly pimp out my books, but over time, it evolved into my very own baby that I’ve learned to love. Kind of like a stepchild who used to shout at me “you’re not my mother!” but that I eventually won over by buying all its underage friends beer. Now, I’m actually really proud of it and it seems to get more and more popular every single day. If you won’t take my word for it, then just look at what all these awesome Nigerian scam artists had to say!
“It is often so ideal plus jam-packed with amusement for me personally and my office co-workers to search the blog.”
“Your work is so dignifying”
“I appreciate your attitude”
“Regards!!!”
“I have about 170k cash machine from… well not spending the television. I have put virtually no effort into making rare metal ever.”
“????????????????????????????. Buy Acai Berries!!”
In conclusion, I hope you enjoy my blog. If not, feel free to send me some bullshit hate mail so I can make fun of your spelling errors. Also, buy acai berries!
Regards!!!!!!!!!!!!
I usually fantasize about my cubicle being the pilot room of a zeppelin, so reading yours was quite terrifying. But once I distanced myself from the thought, it was actually really funny. Carry on.
Why not just burn the entire building like the guy from Office Space?
hello nice to met you Essa
thanks for following
David in Maine USA
Nominated you for a blogger award http://mytiarascrooked.com/2012/08/13/blogger-awards/ enjoy!
I do love it when my greatness is recognized.
No prob!
Drop me a quick line: heellisgoa (at) gmail (dot) com.
I’ve got some interview questions for you if you’d like to answer them for a feature post I’d like to do for you on Sept. 27th. Thanks!
Yep. Read two of your post. I’m now following the shit out of you. Well done.
and that is just how I liked to be followed.
Good, because that’s all I know.
Came across your blog today through Freshly Blessed and I must ask, “Where the hell were you hiding for the past 6 months?” I have been in search of blogs that make me laugh for such a long time now. You are hilarious and I just love your writing style. Following you immediately!
Hahaha.. Freshly Blessed (read it Freshly Pressed). Urgh! Typos.
In all fairness, if I was a religious person, I’d call it Freshly Blessed too. My traffic has been crazy! But thanks so much and I hope you enjoy my site. I have no set posting schedule. I generally just write whenever something pisses me off. So you can probably expect a new post about, um, 7000 times a week.
Ha I love it! Yelling at the news is always a fun past time, I do it often as well. You have some very interesting things to say.
If you like my blog, you should hear the things I say to Bill O’Reilly.
My daughter just introduced me to your blog today. You have a fabulous sense of humor. Just bought us both one of your books for Kindle today. I expect we will be thoroughly entertained. Thanks for writing something worth reading. I love it when people are straight shooters and you definitely are!
thanks! I hope you like it.
Could you add the apology to good reads please. I loved it and I’d like to be able to review it. Thanks, can’t wait to read everything else you’ve written.
no problem. Actually, thanks for the reminder. I have to do that with another book too. My Goodreads account gets kind of neglected.
Hi, I nominated you for the Very Inspiring Blogger Award. Check it out: http://katrinasworks.com/
I’ve nominated you for a Versatile Blog Award. Check out the deets here: http://thefoodiefarmer.wordpress.com/2013/01/16/huh-who-knew/
[...] Essa Alroc of Essa on Everything. This is a woman with a no holds barred libertarian attitude. Nothing is sacred and everything is fair game. She makes no apologies for herself, or for that matter, anyone else. Be sure to wear a flak jacket when you read her blog. Attitude style: female George Carlin. [...]
Hi Essa…You have been nominated for my BLAHS award. Make sure all your followers vote early and often. http://millenniumconjectures.com/2013/01/27/blahs-3-women-with-an-attitude-you-pick-it/
[...] a hotly contested battle, 529 ballots were cast, at least 400 of them by voters other than me. Essa edged out Clotilda by a nose, even though I am pretty sure her nose is not the favorite part of her [...]
[...] interview with Essa! Moving along to more important matters, Essa Alroc, author and blogger, was kind enough to interview me and plaster it on her corner of the interwebs, [...]